Personal Struggles

Nelli · 10-04-2008, 07:37 AM

I've not posted here before. I'm a 53 year old female, retired critical care paramedic, married, two grown daughters, 4 grandchildren.

I've witnessed many miracles in my lifetime so far (many of which were during my career as a paramedic). I know in my heart every single day that our Lord is with me. I've seen His hand in my life, in my work. Still, my own 'personal struggle' has always been "To let go, and let God". I KNOW that life is easier, that things work out better when I do this, yet I find myself at times struggling to give up "control" (even though, in reality, I don't HAVE 'control'). As a paramedic, it was pounded into my head "The lives of your patients are in your hands". As a mother, I felt that my children's lives were my complete responsibility. I'm a 'fixer'. I want to always 'fix things', to 'make things better' for people. Many times, I have to consciously ask God to please, please make me stop, to help me to 'let go and let God".

I'm sure that others have their own 'personal struggles'. Perhaps we can pray for each other that God will release us from these, so that our lives will be more peaceful. A 'prayer chain' of sorts.

Londie · 10-04-2008, 08:29 AM

Nelli you definitely aren't the only one with these struggles. I struggle with letting him have complete control day in and day out with my son and his autism. As a mother, its just instinct to have that feeling that I need to do everything in my power to fix it. But I just have to keep reminding myself to do what I can for him, and let God handle the rest. Not to get stressed out over every little thing.

My son has taught me so much about the little things we all take for granted on a regular basis. Being able to speak and comprehend basic simple words, being able to think for ourselves, and being able to show affection. My boy just recently started giving hugs, kisses, and saying I love you - and he'll be 4 in November. This journey with him has definitely put me in my place, so to speak.

When I hear of other people struggling with letting God have complete control, I'm always reminded of the "Footprints in the Sand" poem. He's never going to leave us alone to fend for ourselves, when that one set of prints is missing in the sand - He carried us.

I have been, and will continue to lift this site and its members up in my prayers, and will pray that all of us will be able to let Him have free reign in our lives.

Eric · 10-04-2008, 10:46 AM

Hi Nelli, and thank you for posting. I'll pray for you!

Have a great weekend!

TommyStrand · 10-04-2008, 06:08 PM

Welcome Nelli and glad you are here =)

A friend of mine called Erik told me a good story once about how our relationship with God is like.

We are like a poor, starving and dirty kid who has nothing except a handful of ragged clothes. A nice, rich man sees the kid and is filled with compassion for him. The rich man wants to take care of the child and give him new clothes, food and lots and lots of money. The only thing the kid needs to do is drop his ragged clothes and receive the good gifts. But for some reason the kid does not take the gifts. He wants to and knows he can, but for him to do so, he must drop the ragged clothes that is clutching so hard on to. It is not much, but is is his. It is all he has and so he is afraid to let go. And so even with the great gifts and blessings laying there right before him, he can not enjoy them.

That is how we often are with God. God has so many blessings for us, but in order to receive them and make them ours, we have to let go of our own stuff. And that can be hard.

Living with God, as you know, is walking in faith, not by sight.

2 Corinthians 5:7
"We live by faith, not by sight."

That does not mean that we are walking blindly, because we see God as we move, but we will never see him if we stand still.

Be of good heart sister. Believe God. He already knows what you need.

Ruzan · 10-06-2008, 05:47 AM

Welcome Nelli, I look forward to your contributions to discussions here! Your story sounds alot like my wife, she has to play peace-keeper all the time, has to fix this and fix that. I try to tell her over and over to let God have it all, I need prayers for her patience and understanding. We will be praying for you Nelli!

Lorie · 12-14-2008, 02:10 PM

Hey

I know I am posting late but I really identified with Nelli this morning. It is so hard for me to just "give it to God"...I too want to fix everything and be responsible for everyone else's feelings. I cried to my Mom once and she said , " There was only one perfect person, and you see what they did to him. " When she said that my mind reflexed on all Jesus went through save us. Saving means so many things. I have had my share of rough times but none compare to the horrible walk that Christ made and dying on a cross for sinners like me. I think when I start to get upset, that I just can't do everything right, I need to remember that Jesus is far more prepared to watch over things. I tell myself this daily when I see my teenagers making choices...

Lorie

10-04-2008, 07:37 AM	#1 (permalink)
Nelli Junior Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Posts: 1 My Photos: (0)	Personal Struggles I've not posted here before. I'm a 53 year old female, retired critical care paramedic, married, two grown daughters, 4 grandchildren. I've witnessed many miracles in my lifetime so far (many of which were during my career as a paramedic). I know in my heart every single day that our Lord is with me. I've seen His hand in my life, in my work. Still, my own 'personal struggle' has always been "To let go, and let God". I KNOW that life is easier, that things work out better when I do this, yet I find myself at times struggling to give up "control" (even though, in reality, I don't HAVE 'control'). As a paramedic, it was pounded into my head "The lives of your patients are in your hands". As a mother, I felt that my children's lives were my complete responsibility. I'm a 'fixer'. I want to always 'fix things', to 'make things better' for people. Many times, I have to consciously ask God to please, please make me stop, to help me to 'let go and let God". I'm sure that others have their own 'personal struggles'. Perhaps we can pray for each other that God will release us from these, so that our lives will be more peaceful. A 'prayer chain' of sorts.

10-04-2008, 08:29 AM	#2 (permalink)
Londie Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Posts: 77 My Photos: (0)	Re: Personal Struggles Nelli you definitely aren't the only one with these struggles. I struggle with letting him have complete control day in and day out with my son and his autism. As a mother, its just instinct to have that feeling that I need to do everything in my power to fix it. But I just have to keep reminding myself to do what I can for him, and let God handle the rest. Not to get stressed out over every little thing. My son has taught me so much about the little things we all take for granted on a regular basis. Being able to speak and comprehend basic simple words, being able to think for ourselves, and being able to show affection. My boy just recently started giving hugs, kisses, and saying I love you - and he'll be 4 in November. This journey with him has definitely put me in my place, so to speak. When I hear of other people struggling with letting God have complete control, I'm always reminded of the "Footprints in the Sand" poem. He's never going to leave us alone to fend for ourselves, when that one set of prints is missing in the sand - He carried us. I have been, and will continue to lift this site and its members up in my prayers, and will pray that all of us will be able to let Him have free reign in our lives. __________________ "What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."

10-04-2008, 10:46 AM	#3 (permalink)
Eric Community Manager Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: San Jose, California Posts: 193 My Photos: (5)	Re: Personal Struggles Hi Nelli, and thank you for posting. I'll pray for you! Have a great weekend! __________________

10-04-2008, 06:08 PM	#4 (permalink)
TommyStrand Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Sandnes, Norway Posts: 151 My Photos: (0)	Re: Personal Struggles Welcome Nelli and glad you are here =) A friend of mine called Erik told me a good story once about how our relationship with God is like. We are like a poor, starving and dirty kid who has nothing except a handful of ragged clothes. A nice, rich man sees the kid and is filled with compassion for him. The rich man wants to take care of the child and give him new clothes, food and lots and lots of money. The only thing the kid needs to do is drop his ragged clothes and receive the good gifts. But for some reason the kid does not take the gifts. He wants to and knows he can, but for him to do so, he must drop the ragged clothes that is clutching so hard on to. It is not much, but is is his. It is all he has and so he is afraid to let go. And so even with the great gifts and blessings laying there right before him, he can not enjoy them. That is how we often are with God. God has so many blessings for us, but in order to receive them and make them ours, we have to let go of our own stuff. And that can be hard. Living with God, as you know, is walking in faith, not by sight. 2 Corinthians 5:7 "We live by faith, not by sight." That does not mean that we are walking blindly, because we see God as we move, but we will never see him if we stand still. Be of good heart sister. Believe God. He already knows what you need.

10-06-2008, 05:47 AM	#5 (permalink)
Ruzan Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Indiana Posts: 106 My Photos: (1)	Re: Personal Struggles Welcome Nelli, I look forward to your contributions to discussions here! Your story sounds alot like my wife, she has to play peace-keeper all the time, has to fix this and fix that. I try to tell her over and over to let God have it all, I need prayers for her patience and understanding. We will be praying for you Nelli! __________________ "In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps." Proverbs 16:9 Last edited by Ruzan; 10-06-2008 at 05:49 AM.

12-14-2008, 02:10 PM	#6 (permalink)
Lorie Junior Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 1 My Photos: (0)	Re: Personal Struggles Hey I know I am posting late but I really identified with Nelli this morning. It is so hard for me to just "give it to God"...I too want to fix everything and be responsible for everyone else's feelings. I cried to my Mom once and she said , " There was only one perfect person, and you see what they did to him. " When she said that my mind reflexed on all Jesus went through save us. Saving means so many things. I have had my share of rough times but none compare to the horrible walk that Christ made and dying on a cross for sinners like me. I think when I start to get upset, that I just can't do everything right, I need to remember that Jesus is far more prepared to watch over things. I tell myself this daily when I see my teenagers making choices... Lorie